The New Archive - Comic Browser

*IMPORTANT NOTICE:*
As some of you may already know, the Archive was deleted for some reason, I had to rebuild it, so it is not yet complete.
Current Status: Up to and including File #49; Links to Archive from Files #1-49; At-A-Glance Arc links to Story Arcs 1-4, and some Ongoing Arcs.  "Notes" sections now in smaller font.
 

Features to be/being added: Links in each comic's post to their respective Archive entries, At-a-glance story arc information/links.

Looking for a particular comic? This page will make it easier to find the File you're looking for, with dates of posting, story arc information, characters featured in the comic (in order of appearance), and other useful bits of intel pointed out. Click on the title or the image from the comic to jump to that comic's page. Enjoy!

Use your browser's search function [Ctrl-F] to search for keywords, such as "Willow," "movie," "Resolute," or "Clutch."

WARNING: This page lists the characters in each comic so that you can easily find the comics which star a character you're looking for. This information might be considered spoiler material. However, the descriptions will never contain spoilers nor ruin the story for you. It is also recommended that you read a comic before reading its notes.

Special Thanks to The David Harris for helping to design this page.


STORY ARCS:
Story 1: Clutch Can't Get It Updated: Part 1 (The Update Gambit), Part 2 (The New Joes), Part 3 (Taking Chances), Part 4 (In the Clutches of Death).
Story 2: Plastic Gear Solid: Tactical Espionage Action Figures: PGS-100, PGS-101, PGS-102, PGS-103, PGS-104, PGS-105, PGS-106, PGS-107.
Story 3: Breaker's Girl: Part 1 (Breaker's Big Score), Part 2 (Alvin's Girl), Part 3 (Achy Breaker Heart).
Story 4: Willow: Part 1 (The Scarlett Letter), Part 2 (Seeing Double), Part 3 (Sibling Rivalry), Part 4 (Public Service Announcement 1), Part 5 (Portrait of the Artist as a Sister).

ONGOING ARCS:
Ongoing 1: Hollywood Movie Pessimism: File 05, File 30, File 34, File 35, File 37, Black Ops Part 1, Black Ops Part 2, Black Ops Part 3
Ongoing 2: Ads, PSAs & Other Lame Filler: File 12, File 24, File 30, File 35,


FILE 01 - "THE UPDATE GAMBIT"
[posted August 23, 2008]
STORY ARC 1: "CLUTCH CAN'T GET IT UPDATED" begins
The Joe team is ready to trade in their "A Real American Hero" bodies for new 25th Anniversary models-- but Clutch gets left out!
STARRING: Scarlett, Snake-Eyes, Stalker, Clutch, Snow Job, Hawk
View wiki entry


FILE 02 - "THE NEW JOES"
[posted August 30, 2008]
STORY ARC 1: "CLUTCH CAN'T GET IT UPDATED" continues
The Joes get their great new bodies, and Clutch finds support from his old friend Jack.
STARRING: Clutch, Snow Job, Hawk, Scarlett, Snake-Eyes, Flash
Notes:
First appearance of Flash, and Clutch's signature bottle of Jack; first usage of crappy Photoshop special effects. Snake-Eyes "speaks" in internet smiley faces.  Bitches love smiley faces.  Panel 11: Flash is the Joes' Laser Rifle Trooper.

FILE 03 - "TAKING CHANCES"
[posted September 6, 2008]
STORY ARC 1: "CLUTCH CAN'T GET IT UPDATED" continues
Clutch wants to learn more about 25th Anniversary bodies. Scarlett's, to be specific.
STARRING: Clutch, Scarlett, Snake-Eyes, Lifeline, Doc
Notes:
First appearances of Lifeline and Doc. Scarlett's mug is from a Captain Picard figure from Star Trek: The Next Generation.

FILE 04 - "IN THE CLUTCHES OF DEATH"
[posted September 12, 2008]
STORY ARC 1: "CLUTCH CAN'T GET IT UPDATED" ends
Doc has to make a tough decision. Will Clutch ever be the same again?
STARRING: Hawk, Doc, Flash, Scarlett, Snake-Eyes, Breaker, Snow Job, Stalker, Clutch, VAMP [vehicle], Sakura [from Street Fighter]
Notes:
First appearances of Breaker, Sakura [from Street Fighter], and of a vehicle, the VAMP. The VAMP appears as it does out of the box; it doesn't have all its stickers applied.

FILE 05 - "THE SILVER SCREEN"
[posted September 19, 2008]
ONGOING ARC 1: HOLLYWOOD MOVIE PESSIMISM, next seen in File #30 "Rip Off"
Breaker is really not looking forward to Hollywood's attempt to make a live-action movie based on G.I. Joe. Can his friends manage to cheer him up?
STARRING: VAMP [vehicle], Armadillo [vehicle], Breaker, Hawk, Clutch, Steeler, Grand Slam, the Batman, Optimus Prime
Notes:
First Hollywood hostility comic.  First appearances of Steeler, Grand Slam, the Armadillo [vehicle], the Batman, and Optimus Prime.

FILE PGS-100
[posted September 26, 2008]
STORY ARC 2: "PLASTIC GEAR SOLID: TACTICAL ESPIONAGE ACTION FIGURES" begins
The prologue to a next story arc, a parodic tribute to Hideo Kojima's Metal Gear Solid. The Plastic Gear Solid arc is completely non-canonical with the rest of the Ages 25 & Up stories.
STARRING: Hawk [as Col. Abernathy], Steeler, Stalker, Solid Snake-Eyes
Notes:
First Plastic Gear comic; first non-canon "special event;" first time real comic book art used in an Ages 25 & Up strip [see first panel].

FILE PGS-101
[posted October 3, 2008]
STORY ARC 2: "PLASTIC GEAR SOLID: TACTICAL ESPIONAGE ACTION FIGURES" continues
Solid Snake-Eyes meets his support staff, including the feisty Bei Jing, and trains in the VR Simulator.
STARRING: Hawk [as Col. Abernathy], Solid Snake-Eyes, Sakura [as Bei Jing], Cobra Viper
Notes:
First appearance of a Cobra character, in this case a Viper. The "goal" is the base from a McFarlane's Cortana [from Halo].

FILE PGS-102: INFILTRATION
[posted October 10, 2008]
STORY ARC 2: "PLASTIC GEAR SOLID: TACTICAL ESPIONAGE ACTION FIGURES" continues
Solid Snake-Eyes stealthy enters Cobra's base, but, according to a pair of Vipers, he might not be alone!
STARRING: Hawk [as Col. Abernathy], Solid Snake-Eyes, Captain Jean-Luc Picard [as Fred Arbco, Director of M.A.R.S.], Cobra Commander, Cobra Officer, Crimson Guard, Destro, Scarlett [as the Colonel's niece], Cobra Viper, Maggot
Notes:
First appearances of Captain Jean-Luc Picard, Cobra Commander, Cobra Officer, Crimson Guard, Destro, and Maggot [vehicle]. The Cobra Island Nuclear Launch Base is the Micro Machines Battle Zones Night Attack Playset. Special Thanks to Donovan Tomlinson for equipment rental.

FILE PGS-103: THE DETENTION LEVEL
[posted October 17, 2008]
STORY ARC 2: "PLASTIC GEAR SOLID: TACTICAL ESPIONAGE ACTION FIGURES" continues
Solid Snake-Eyes attempts to break the M.A.R.S. Director out of the Cobra prison level.
STARRING: Captain Jean-Luc Picard [as Fred Arbco, Director of M.A.R.S.], Scarlett [as the Colonel's niece], Cobra Officer, Solid Snake-Eyes, Cobra Commander, Destro, Crimson Guard, Flash [as Dr. Anthony 'Weeaboo' Gambello]
Notes:
Panel 11: The nuke is the missile which came with Transformers Cybertron Cybertron Defense Red Alert. Its storage case is a Sigma 6 weapons case. Panels 14 & 15: The Cobra Island Nuclear Launch Base is the Micro Machines Battle Zones Night Attack Playset. Panel 0: The "one-legged kid with an eyepatch" is a reference to Cobra Commander's son, Billy. Special Thanks to Donovan Tomlinson for equipment rental.

FILE PGS-104: CONFRONTATION
[posted October 24, 2008]
STORY ARC 2: "PLASTIC GEAR SOLID: TACTICAL ESPIONAGE ACTION FIGURES" continues
Dr. Anthony Gambello, chief engineer on the Plastic Gear project, is in deep trouble. Can Solid Snake-Eyes reach him in time?
STARRING: Scarlett [as the Colonel's niece], Solid Snake-Eyes, Destro, Flash [as Dr. Anthony 'Weeaboo' Gambello], Storm Shadow
Notes:
First appearance of Storm Shadow. The fight between Storm Shadow and Solid Snake-Eyes is a reference to Capcom's Street Fighter video games.

FILE PGS-105: A BULLET FLIES...
[posted November 1, 2008]
STORY ARC 2: "PLASTIC GEAR SOLID: TACTICAL ESPIONAGE ACTION FIGURES" continues, resumes in File PGS-106
Scarlett and Solid Snake-Eyes get on the Baroness' bad side.
STARRING: Solid Snake-Eyes, Hawk [as Col. Abernathy], Scarlett [as the Colonel's niece], the Baroness, Flash [as Dr. Anthony 'Weeaboo' Gambello], Cobra Viper
Notes:
First appearance of the Baroness. The title of this issue is a reference to the tagline from the promo for Devil's Due's Snake-Eyes Declassified #5 : "A single arrow flies. Brothers become enemies." Scarlett's line "Continue the mission" is also a reference to Snake-Eyes Declassified. Scarlett's satchel is from an Indiana Jones figure.

FILE 12 - "ROCAB FAMILY TAILORS"
[posted November 7, 2008]
ONGOING ARC 2: ADS,  PSAs & OTHER LAME FILLER, next seen in File #24 "Public Service Announcement 1"; Intermission of "PLASTIC GEAR SOLID" arc, which resumes in File PGS-106
A commercial break from the Plastic Gear story. Read about Cobra's amazing fashions, available now!
STARRING: Cobra Viper, Maggot [vehicle], Cobra Officer, Destro, HISS Tank Mark II [vehicle], Crimson Guard, Baroness, Cobra Commander
Notes:
First advertisement/filler comic.  First appearance of a HISS Tank, in this case, the HISS Mark II. Cobra Commander's throne is Crystal Skeleton's throne, a mail-in exclusive. Special Thanks to Homer for helping me get the Crystal Skeleton.

FILE PGS-106
[posted November 15, 2008]
STORY ARC 2: "PLASTIC GEAR SOLID: TACTICAL ESPIONAGE ACTION FIGURES" resumes
Cobra has the upper hand. Can the heroes prevent Cobra's nuclear attack?
STARRING: Cobra Commander, Dr. Mindbender, the Baroness, Solid Snake-Eyes, Cobra Officer, Sakura [as Bei Jing], Hawk [as Col. Abernathy], Flash [as Dr. Anthony 'Weeaboo' Gambello], Scarlett [as the Colonel's niece], Storm Shadow, Rock N Roll, Clutch
Notes:
First appearances of Dr. Mindbender and Rock N Roll. Panel 1: There is a Cobra sigil made with Battleship pegs in the background. Panel 33: The "Training Snake-Eyes" figure is a Ninja from the Speed Racer movie toy line. Special Thanks to Donovan Tomlinson for "Training Snake-Eyes" and to Homer for Rock N Roll.

FILE PGS-107: ENDGAME
[posted November 21, 2008]
STORY ARC 2: "PLASTIC GEAR SOLID: TACTICAL ESPIONAGE ACTION FIGURES" ends
Time has run out... Cobra Commander activates Plastic Gear!
STARRING: Flash [as Dr. Anthony 'Weeaboo' Gambello], Scarlett [as the Colonel's niece], Solid Snake-Eyes, Storm Shadow, Starscream [as Plastic Gear], Cobra Commander, Clutch, VAMP [vehicle], Rock N Roll, RAM Cycle [vehicle], Wild Bill, Cobra Viper, Hawk [as Col. Abernathy], Serpentor, Destro
Notes:
First appearances of Starscream [from The Transformers], the RAM Cycle [vehicle], Wild Bill and Serpentor. "Starscream" calls Storm Shadow "treacherous," a term often used to describe Starscream. In the '80s cartoons, Chris Latta voiced both Starscream and Cobra Commander. Much of the battle dialogue is taken from Street Fighter II. "Are you in or out?" is a reference to IDW's G.I. Joe #0. "Plastic Gear Rex" is a "movie Starscream" figure. Special Thanks to Donovan Tomlinson for equipment rental and to Homer for Rock N Roll and the RAM Cycle.

FILE #15 - "BREAKER'S BIG SCORE"
[posted November 28, 2008]
STORY ARC 3: "BREAKER'S GIRL" begins
Breaker's found himself a woman. This calls for a celebration, Clutch-style!
STARRING: Scarlett, Hawk, Steeler, Grand Slam, Breaker, Grunt, Clutch, Rock N Roll, Snake-Eyes, Stalker, Flash, Batgirl, Indiana Jones, Sallah [from Raiders of the Lost Ark], Willow [from Dreadstar], Sakura, Cortana [from Halo]
Notes:
Title of the File is a reference to the Futurama movie Bender's Big Score. The original title for the File was "Breaker's Big News." First appearances of Grunt, Batgirl, Indiana Jones, Sallah, Willow, and Cortana. First time Stalker appears in his 25th Anniversary body. Panel 10: Grunt gets to know Willow from Jim Starlin's Dreadstar; Sallah's line is a play on "Asps. Very dangerous. You go first," a line he uses in Raiders of the Lost Ark. Special Thanks to Joebern28 for Grunt and to Homer for Rock N Roll.

FILE #16 - "ALVIN'S GIRL"
[posted December 5, 2008]
STORY ARC 3: "BREAKER'S GIRL" continues
Breaker learns about his fiancée -- the hard way.
STARRING: Breaker, Rock N Roll, Clutch
Notes:
Title of the File is a reference to "the greatest song ever written," Rick Springfield's Jessie's Girl. Breaker's Filename is Alvin R. Kibbey. The terracotta horse, the diamond, and Clutch's belt are from the Indiana Jones toy line. Breaker was frequently seen chewing bubble gum in the Marvel G.I. Joe comics. Special Thanks to Homer for Rock N Roll.

FILE #17 - "ACHY BREAKER HEART"
[posted December 12, 2008]
STORY ARC 3: "BREAKER'S GIRL" ends
Will Breaker ever solve his woman troubles?
STARRING: Rock N Roll, Breaker, Clutch, Stalker; Donatello, Michaelangelo, Leonardo, and April O'Neil [Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles]
Notes:
Title of the File is a reference to the song Achy Breaky Heart. First appearances of Donatello, Michaelangelo, Leonardo, and April O'Neil. Panel 2: The letter is a Lego piece. Special Thanks to Homer for Rock N Roll.

FILE #18 - "TAPPING THE RAM"
[posted December 20, 2008]
STORY ARC: NONE
Clutch works on a new RAM Cycle, but there's more to this bike than meets the eye.
STARRING: movie Arcee [Transformers], Clutch, Hawk, Scarlett, Stalker, Lady Jaye, Rock N Roll
Notes:
First appearances of Lady Jaye and movie Arcee. Panel 2: The "rrratchet" sound effect is a reference to the Transformers character Ratchet. Panels 11 & 12: The movie Arcee figure has a terrible headsculpt, hence the paper bag. Special Thanks to Vash for Lady Jaye and to Homer for Rock N Roll.

FILE #19 - "SPECIAL OCCASIONS"
[posted December 28, 2008]
SPECIAL EVENTS series, next seen in File #44 "Clutch Knows Best"
Can Snow Job survive a daring mission in the unforgiving north?
STARRING: Wild Bill, Hawk, Snow Job, Clutch, Stalker, Scarlett, Lady Jaye, Grand Slam
Notes: The title is a reference to Marvel Comics' G.I. Joe: Special Missions. First holiday-themed issue. Special Thanks to Donovan Tomlinson for the Christmas Village in Panel 2 and to Vash for Lady Jaye.

FILE #20 - "THE SCARLETT LETTER"
[posted January 2, 2009]
STORY ARC 4: "WILLOW" begins, resumes in File #22 "Seeing Double"
Ms. O'Hara's got mail.
STARRING: Rock N Roll, Mainframe, Scarlett, Snake-Eyes, Breaker, Clutch, Stalker
Notes: First appearance of Mainframe. The title is a reference to Nathaniel Hawthorne's 1850 novel The Scarlet Letter. A detail shot of Clutch's and Stalker's Scrabble board can be found here. Special Thanks to Homer for Rock N Roll.

FILE #21 - "SILENT AUCTION"
[posted January 9, 2009]
SILENT SERIES, next seen in File #100
A tribute to Marvel Comics' silent 21st issue of G.I. Joe, "Silent Interlude."
STARRING: Crimson Guard, Cobra Viper, Major Bludd, Cobra Officer, Cobra B.A.T., Storm Shadow, HISS Tank Mark II [vehicle], Snake-Eyes, Duke Nukem, Cobra Commander, the Baroness, Serpentor, Indiana Jones, Faye Valentine and Spike Spiegel [from Cowboy Bebop], Megatron [from The Transformers], Ulala [from Space Channel 5], and Destro
Notes: First appearances of Major Bludd, Cobra B.A.T., Duke Nukem, Faye Valentine, Spike Spiegel, Megatron, and Ulala. Duke Nukem is a custom-made figure; more information and photos can be found here and here. Blue Comic Pack Destro officially replaced by DVD Pack Destro. The bid reaches 21K - Silent Interlude was issue #21 in Marvel Comics' G.I. Joe run. Indiana Jones bids 36K - Raiders of the Lost Ark took place in 1936. Indiana Jones switching the B.A.T.'s head unit for the Fertility Idol mimics his switching a weighted bag of sand for the same Fertility Idol in Raiders of the Lost Ark. The "cover" at the end of the comic is tribute to Silent Interlude's cover.

FILE #22 - "SEEING DOUBLE"
[posted January 16, 2009]
STORY ARC 4: "WILLOW" resumes
Scarlett's twin sister Willow [from Dreadstar] visits the Pit!
STARRING: Dusty, Roadblock, Rock N Roll, Clutch, Lady Jaye, Steeler, Snow Job, Grand Slam, Beachhead, Grunt, Stalker, Mainframe, Lift-Ticket, Flash, Hawk, Scarlett, Willow, Wild Bill, Snake-Eyes, Breaker
Notes: First appearances of Dusty, Roadblock, Beachhead, and Lift-Ticket. DVD Pack Lady Jaye appears instead of Single-Carded Lady Jaye. Beachhead mentions the Street Fighters: in the '90s, Hasbro made official Street Fighter video game and movie action figures; some are considered part of the G.I. Joe toy line. The Comic Pack Scarlett figure in her "comic colours" strongly resembles the character of Willow from Jim Starlin's comic Dreadstar. The characters do not actually have any relation, and don't even exist within the same universe. Scarlett does in fact have a sister who appeared in the Marvel comic. Sioban O'Hara tried to get her sister off life support after Scarlett had been shot and was in a coma in order to get part of their family's property all to herself. Panel 5: Mainframe's line is a reference to his hand being sculpted with two extended fingers. Panel 9: Lift-Ticket's line makes good use of the large grin sculpted into his face. Panels 11 to 13: Many G.I. Joe fans were upset that Matt Trakker from the 80's franchise M.A.S.K. was given a figure in the G.I. Joe 25th Anniversary line. Panel 16: Roadblock speaks in his borderline-racist rhyming fashion, inspired by the '80s G.I. Joe cartoon. Special Thanks to Homer for Rock N Roll, to Joebern28 for Grunt, and to Imperial_Ozma for pointing out that Willow appeared in File #15 "Breaker's Big Score" even though she hadn't been introduced yet.

FILE #23 - "SIBLING RIVALRY"
[posted January 23, 2009]
STORY ARC 4: "WILLOW" continues
Clutch gets to know Scarlett's twin sister Willow. What could possibly go wrong?
STARRING: Scarlett, Hawk, Steeler, Willow, Clutch, VAMP [vehicle]
Notes: The VAMP's machine guns are aiming up in Panels 6, 8, 9, and 10, but are aiming forward in Panels 5, 11, 12, and 13.

FILE #24 - "PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT 1"
[posted January 30, 2009]
STORY ARC 4: "WILLOW" continues, resumes in File #29 "Portrait of the Artist as a Sister"
ONGOING ARC 2: ADS,  PSAs & OTHER LAME FILLER, next seen in File #30; 
It's all fun and games until someone gets pregnant.
STARRING: Scarlett, Willow, Clutch, Hawk, Breaker, Dick Wanker, Ulala [from Space Channel 5]
Notes: First appearances of Dick Wanker, news anchor for CUNL-TV. First 'public service announcement'-style comic. The line "Gimme some sugar, baby" is lifted from Army of Darkness. Breaker's video camera has a tag that reads "Property of Scoop." Scoop was the Joes' Information Specialist and was named and modeled after NBC news reporter Mike Leonard. "CUNL" does not stand for anything. Say the letters out loud - "See You In Hell."

FILE #25 - "THE TIFF"
[posted February 6, 2009]
STORY ARC 5: "TRADING PLACES" begins
Destro and the Cobra Commander have yet another argument. But the Baroness has an plan to end their petty squabbles...
STARRING: Cobra Commander, Destro, Cobra B.A.T., Cobra Trooper, the Baroness, Major Bludd, Destro Commander, Cobra Supplier
Notes: Title of the File is lifted from an episode of ReBoot. Title of the story arc is lifted from the 1983 comedy Trading Places, starring Dan Aykroyd and Eddie Murphy. First appearances of Cobra Trooper, Destro Commander, and Cobra Supplier. The Weather Dominator is seen in pieces, among parts of the MASS Device. Panel 4: Cobra Troopers came with Druganovs and Cobra Officers came with AK-47s in the '80s Joe toy line. Panel 7: So far, the Cobra Commander has only been seen in his Ceremonial Cowl rather than the "silver helmet" Battle Helmet that Destro mentions. First appearance of Resolute Cobra Commander... sort of. "Destro Commander" is Resolute Cobra Commander sans cape and with Comic Pack Destro's head. "Cobra Supplier" is blue Comic Pack Destro with Resolute Cobra Commander's head and helmet.

FILE #26 - "MY RESOLUTION"
[posted February 13, 2009]
STORY ARC 5: "TRADING PLACES" continues
Cobra Supplier introduces Destro Commander to the new Resolute Trooper.
STARRING: Cobra Viper, Cobra Officer, Major Bludd, Destro [as Destro Commander], Crimson Guard, Cobra Commander [as Cobra Supplier], Resolute Trooper,
Notes: Title of the File is a reference to G.I. Joe Resolute and Cobra Supplier's promise. First appearance of the Resolute Trooper. Panel 1: On Destro Commander's RISK board, blue pieces represent Cobra forces, green pieces represent G.I. Joe forces, and red pieces represent the Oktober Guard.

FILE #27 - "CRIMSON GUIDANCE"
[posted February 20, 2009]
STORY ARC 5: "TRADING PLACES" continues
Feeling blue (no pun intended), Cobra Supplier looks like he'll need a hug.
STARRING: Crimson Guard, Cobra Commander [as Cobra Supplier], Zartan, the Baroness
Notes: Title of the File is a reference to the Crimson Guard, who are vital to this story arc due to their actions in this File. First appearance of Zartan. Special Thanks to Homer for Zartan.

FILE #28 - "THE NEW CHALLENGERS"
[posted February 26, 2009]
STORY ARC 5: "TRADING PLACES" ends
Cobra Supplier introduces the Cobra forces to their new recruits.
STARRING: Cobra Commander [as Cobra Supplier], Destro [as Destro Commander], the Baroness, Cobra Trooper, Storm Shadow, Cobra Officer, Cobra Viper, Major Bludd, Zartan, Crimson Guard, Resolute Trooper, "Crimson Viper," M. Bison [from Street Fighter], Cammy [from Street Fighter], Croc Master, Dick Wanker
Notes: Title of the File is a tribute to Super Street Fighter II: The New Challengers, in which new characters were introduced. First appearance of 5-Pack Viper. Single-Carded Baroness [repainted] officially replaced by 5-Pack Baroness. Comic Pack Storm Shadow officially replaced by Single-Carded Storm Shadow. Single-Carded Zartan officially replaced by 5-Pack Zartan with repainted chest armour. Panel 5: "C. Viper" is a character from Street Fighter IV; the "Cannon Drill" is one of Cammy's signature fighting moves. Panel 7: The Weather Dominator appears in the background, apparently rebuilt since File #25 "The Tiff." Panel 13: Hawk was hospitalized in File #24 "Public Service Announcement 1." Special Thanks to The David Harris for suggesting that Croc Master should have a bondage fetish.

FILE #29 - "PORTRAIT OF THE ARTIST AS A SISTER"
[posted March 5, 2009]
STORY ARC 4: "WILLOW" resumes, ends
Hawk gets out of the hospital, and Clutch updates him on the Willow situation.
STARRING: Hawk, Clutch; Mortdred, Cravex, Cryotek, Cindarr [from Visionaries]; Law & Order, Willow
Notes: Title of the File is a reference to James Joyce's A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man, as well as pun on Willow's intentions. First appearances of Mortdred, Cravex, Cryotek, Cindarr [from Visionaries], and Law & Order. First use of digital backgrounds.

FILE 30 - "RIP OFF"
[posted March 13, 2009]
ONGOING ARC 1: HOLLYWOOD MOVIE PESSIMISM, next seen in File #34 "The RISE of Cobra"
ONGOING ARC 2: ADS,  PSAs & OTHER LAME FILLER, next seen in File #35;
Rip Cord shares some wisdom with the younger generation.
STARRING: Ripper, Torch, Timmy, Rip Cord, Optimus Prime, Leon S. Kennedy [from Resident Evil], Megatron, Ravage, Soundwave [from The Transformers]
Notes:
First appearances of Ripper, Torch, Timmy, Rip Cord, Leon S. Kennedy [from Resident Evil]; and Megatron, Ravage, Soundwave [from The Transformers]. Leon S. Kennedy is a crappy custom-made figure; more pictures can be found here. Optimus Prime makes reference to Transformers Animated as well as Hollywood's attempt at making action flicks very, very loosely based on The Transformers. Leon S. Kennedy makes reference to the CGI-animated Resident Evil: Degeneration, the first accurate Resident Evil movie.

FILE 31 - "TIGER WTFORCE"
[posted March 19, 2009]
ONGOING ARC 2: BEARD FORCE, next seen in File #32 "Beard Force"
Flint tries to explain.
STARRING: Flint, Grunt, Lady Jaye, Stalker, Hawk, RAM Cycle [vehicle], Rock N Roll, VAMP [vehicle], Clutch, Shipwreck & Polly, Snow Cat [vehicle], Snow Job
Notes:
First appearances of Flint, Shipwreck & Polly, and the Snow Cat [vehicle]. Lady Jaye appears once again in her Single-Carded body. This File was shot before the "Willow" story but was held back due to the need to introduce the character of Willow following her appearance in File #15 "Breaker's Big Score." The Tiger Force Flint figure was later customized into Leon S. Kennedy. Special Thanks to Joebern28 for Grunt, Vash for Lady Jaye, and to Homer for Rock N Roll and the RAM Cycle.

FILE #32 - "BEARD FORCE"
[posted March 27, 2009]
ONGOING ARC 2: BEARD FORCE, next seen in File #33 "The Old Apartment"
Top Secret information on the Joes' most unique subgroup revealed for the first time.
STARRING: Rock N Roll, Snow Job, Shipwreck & Polly, Clutch, Snow Cat [vehicle], VAMP [vehicle], RAM Cycle [vehicle], Cobra Viper, Cobra Officer, Cobra Commander, Snake-Eyes, Flint, Scarlett, Lady Jaye
Notes: Cobra Commander's throne, last seen in File #12 "Rocab Family Tailors," makes an appearance. It rests atop a display stand from a Titanium Series Transformers figure. Tiger Force Flint officially replaced by 5-Pack Flint. Scarlett is seen with her "new headsculpt" mentioned in File #29 "Portrait of the Artist as a Sister." Rock N Roll is a weight lifter and plays bass, according to his Filecard. Beard Force is shown playing music with the instruments from the Stikfas "The Stikers Band" action figure kit. Special Thanks to Homer for Rock N Roll and the RAM Cycle, and to Vash for Lady Jaye.

FILE #33 - "THE OLD APARTMENT"
[posted April 3, 2009]
ONGOING ARC 2: BEARD FORCE, next seen in File #36 "King of the Grill"
Thanks to the funding that Beard Force received from the G.I. Joe Subgroup Funding Budget, Clutch was able to move on up -- and out!
STARRING: Rock N Roll, Snow Job, Clutch, Shipwreck; Ulala, Pudding, and Evila [from Space Channel 5]; Gambit, Deadpool
Notes: Title of the File is lifted from a song by The Barenaked Ladies. First appearances of Pudding and Evila [from Space Channel 5]; of Gambit, and Deadpool. The wooden crates are from Indiana Jones figures. Panel 9: When this comic was made, the Hollywood actor who plays Deadpool was married to the Hollywood actress who played the Black Widow. Special Thanks to Homer for Rock N Roll.

FILE #34 - "THE RISE OF COBRA"
[posted April 10, 2009]
ONGOING ARC 1: HOLLYWOOD MOVIE PESSIMISM, next seen in File #35 "Public Service Announcement 2"
This is File #34, and it rules! Some lucky Vipers get trained by the Baroness.
STARRING: Cobra Viper, the Baroness, HISS Tank [vehicle]
Notes: Title of the File is lifted from the title of Hollywood's attempt at making an action flick loosely based on G.I. Joe, but also a reference to "Rule of the Internet #34," which states that if something exists, there IS porn of it. First appearance of the Mark I Cobra HISS Tank. The Baroness is armed with the 5-Pack Viper's assault rifle/grenade launcher and Indiana Jones' whip. Panel 10: The Vipers' pants feature Photoshopped bulges.

FILE #35 - "PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT 2"
[posted April 17, 2009]
ONGOING ARC 2: ADS,  PSAs & OTHER LAME FILLER, next seen in File #30;
A reminder to watch G.I. Joe: Resolute. Is Duke talking out of his ass? Watch Resolute and find out!
STARRING: Resolute Duke; Faye Valentine, Spike Spiegel, and Ein [from Cowboy Bebop]; Resolute Cobra Commander, Resolute Trooper
Notes: First appearance of Ein [from Cowboy Bebop]. Resolute took a bit longer to hit BitTorrent than the Resolute Trooper predicted.  And he WAS taking out of his ass, as Resolute was nothing more than a rickroll intended to distract us while Hollywood did what they wanted to the franchise.

FILE #36 - "KING OF THE GRILL"
[posted April 24, 2009]
ONGOING ARC 2: BEARD FORCE; next seen in File #41 "Cards, Knives, & Videotape"
Clutch invites some friends over to his new pad.
STARRING: Clutch, Short-Fuze, Breaker, Snow Job, Lady Jaye, Flint, Shipwreck, Stalker, Rock N Roll, Charbroil, Wild Bill
Notes: First appearances of Short-Fuze and Charbroil. "Big Kahuna Burger" is a fictional fast-food restaurant from Pulp Fiction. Panel 5: Stalker's line is lifted directly from Pulp Fiction. Panel 6: Charbroil's barbecue gear is from a Playmobil set. Special Thanks to Vash for Lady Jaye and to Homer for Short-Fuze and Rock N Roll.

FILE #37 - "THE REIMAGINING"
[posted May 1, 2009]
ONGOING ARC 1: HOLLYWOOD MOVIE PESSIMISM, next seen in "Black Ops," Part One
The first rule of Cobra is you don't talk about Cobra.
STARRING: Hawk [as Edward Norton's boss], Edward Norton, the Baroness, Cobra Viper, Crimson Guard, Cobra Officer, Cobra Trooper, Resolute Trooper, Resolute Cobra Commander, Grand Slam, Grunt, Short-Fuze
Notes: Title of File is lifted from a Penny Arcade comic. Entire File is an homage to Fight Club. First appearance of Edward Norton. Ed Norton's monologue contains several Cobra references: the "combination assault rifle/grenade launcher" is the standard-issue weapon of Cobra Vipers, and "that friendly new neighbor of yours" is lifted from the Crimson Guards' Filecard. Panel 16: Cobra Commander used to be a used car salesman before he founded Cobra Command. Special Thanks to Homer for Short-Fuze.

"BLACK OPS," PART ONE
[posted May 8, 2009]
STORY ARC 5: "BLACK OPS" begins
ONGOING ARC 1: HOLLYWOOD MOVIE PESSIMISM, next seen in "Black Ops," Part Two
The mission Beachhead and Dusty couldn't talk about - until now.
STARRING: Lady Jaye, Clutch, Flint, Beachhead, Dusty, Hawk, Next-Generation Special Forces, Cobra Viper
Notes: First appearances of the Next-Generation Special Forces. Panels 1 & 2: Dusty and Beachhead use 5-Pack Cobra Commander's staff as a pool cue. The "Next-Generation Special Forces" are the "Hulkbuster Unit" figures from the The Incredible Hulk movie line, and are remoulded from Joes. Special Thanks to Vash for Lady Jaye.

"BLACK OPS," PART TWO
[posted May 15, 2009]
STORY ARC 5: "BLACK OPS" continues
ONGOING ARC 1: HOLLYWOOD MOVIE PESSIMISM, next seen in "Black Ops," Part Three
The Black Op gets shot down.
STARRING: Dusty, Beachhead, Next-Generation Special Forces, Cobra Viper, Firefly
Notes: First appearance of Firefly. First comic to be shot outdoors.

"BLACK OPS," PART THREE
[posted May 22, 2009]
STORY ARC 5: "BLACK OPS" ends
ONGOING ARC 1: HOLLYWOOD MOVIE PESSIMISM, next seen in "Black Ops," Part Three
Stranded in Cobra territory, Beachhead and Dusty must rely on their wits -- and each other -- to survive.
STARRING: Beachhead, Dusty, Firefly, HISS Tank Mark II [vehicle], Moray [vehicle], Breaker, Wild Bill, Cobra Commander
Notes: First appearance of the Moray [vehicle]. Panel 6: The map is from a Lego Indiana Jones set.

FILE #41 - "CARDS, KNIVES, & VIDEOTAPE"
[posted May 29, 2009]
ONGOING ARC 2: BEARD FORCE, next seen in File #42 "Cards, Knives, & Videotape," Part 2

Clutch embarks on a risky solo mission!
STARRING: Clutch, Batgirl, Jinx, Gambit
Notes: Title of File is a reference to sex, lies, and videotape. First appearances of Batgirl and Jinx. Panel 12 is lifted from Watchmen Chapter 5, "Fearful Symmetry." The cardboard box is a reference to Metal Gear Solid. Special Thanks to Marvel and DC Comics.

FILE #42 - "CARDS, KNIVES, & VIDEOTAPE," PART 2
[posted June 5, 2009]
ONGOING ARC 2: BEARD FORCE, next seen in File #42 "Car
Can Beard Force save Clutch in time?
STARRING: Batgirl, Snow Job, Shipwreck, Ulala, Rock N Roll, Ms. Marvel, Jinx, Gambit, Clutch, Deadpool, Dick Wanker
Notes: Title of File is a reference to sex, lies, and videotape. First appearance of Ms. Marvel. Panel 3: Shipwreck's story is the "Tales of the Black Freighter" subplot of Watchmen. Panel 9: The exclamation mark over Gambit's head is a reference to Metal Gear Solid. Special Thanks to Marvel and DC Comics, to Homer, and to Imperial_Ozma,

ARMY OF PLASTIC, CHAPTER ONE: "BOOK OF THE DREAD"
[posted June 12, 2009]
STORY ARC 6: "ARMY OF PLASTIC" begins, resumes in "Army of Plastic," Chapter 2
Flint and Lady Jaye's covert operation just hit a major snag.
STARRING: Torch, Lady Jaye, Zartan, Ripper, Flint, Buzzer, VAMP [vehicle], Oil Slick [from Transformers Animated], Green Army Men of Plastic [GAMPs]; Kirk, Spock [from Star Trek]; Stikfas
Notes: First appearances of Buzzer, Oil Slick [from Transformers Animated], the Green Army Men of Plastic [GAMPs], Kirk & Spock [from Star Trek], and the Stikfas. The Army of Plastic story is a parodic spoof of Army of Darkness. The "Book of the Dread" is a play on the Book of the Dead. Panel 2: The Book of the Dread is Dr. Henry Jones Sr.'s diary from the Indiana Jones line. Panel 12: Redshirts are Starfleet's most expendable members, who are frequently killed, similar to Cobra's "blueshirts." Panel 15: Kirk's exclamation is a reference to Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan. Panel 17: The last time Cobra showed interest in the GAMPs was with the G.I. Joe train set, which featured plastic army men. Special Thanks to Donovan Tomlinson, Vash, Sam Raimi, Robert Tapert, and Bruce Campbell.

FILE #44 - "CLUTCH KNOWS BEST"
[posted June 19, 2009]
SPECIAL EVENTS series, next seen in File #44 "
It's up to Wild Bill and Clutch to save young David from a disguised threat!
STARRING: David, Ravage, Wild Bill, Clutch, VAMP [vehicle], Prowl
Notes: First appearances of David and Prowl. The title is a reference to Father Knows Best. Panel 1: TK-421 is a Stormtrooper from Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope who wasn't at his post. David is one of Clutch's many illegitimate children. Happy Father's Day!

ARMY OF PLASTIC, CHAPTER TWO
[posted June 26, 2009]
STORY ARC 6: "ARMY OF PLASTIC" resumes
The GAMPs find Flint fit -- for the pit!
STARRING: Flint, Green Army Men of Plastic [GAMPs], Stikfas, Lady Jaye, Torch, Zartan, Buzzer, Oil Slick [from Transformers Animated], Link [from The Legend of Zelda: The Ocarina of Time]
Notes: First appearances of Link [from The Legend of Zelda: The Ocarina of Time]. The Army of Plastic story is a parodic spoof of Army of Darkness. The "Book of the Dread" is a play on the Book of the Dead. Panel 11: "Buzzer's chainsaw" actually belongs to the Stikfas Alpha Male Firefighter. Special Thanks to Vash, Sam Raimi, Robert Tapert, and Bruce Campbell.

ARMY OF PLASTIC, CHAPTER THREE: "DREAD BY DAWN"
[posted July 3, 2009]
STORY ARC 6: "ARMY OF PLASTIC" continues
Looks can be deceiving!
STARRING: Flint, Oil Slick [from Transformers Animated], Ripper, Lady Jaye, Torch, VAMP [vehicle], Zarana, the Baroness, Maggot [vehicle], Resolute Trooper, Cobra Viper, HISS Tank [vehicle], HISS Tank Mark II [vehicle], Cobra Trooper
Notes: First appearances of Zarana. Title of File is a reference to Evil Dead 2: Dead by Dawn. Panel 3: Lady Jaye appears with her hatless DVD pack head. The hat which Ripper puts on belongs to the Stikfas Alpha Male Police Officer. Panel 11: Flint was an English Major before joining the military. Panel 16: The dialogue is lifted directly from Army of Darkness. Panel 18-onward: In the Marvel G.I. Joe comics, Zarana and the Baroness did not get along, and were often at each others' throats. It was hot. Special Thanks to Vash, latinjoe22, Sam Raimi, Robert Tapert, and Bruce Campbell.

ARMY OF PLASTIC, CHAPTER FOUR: "COBRA BARADA NIKTO"
[posted July 10, 2009]
STORY ARC 6: "ARMY OF PLASTIC" continues
Cobra begins their invasion of the GAMP Province!
STARRING: Flint, Lady Jaye, VAMP [vehicle], GAMPs, Ultra Magnus [from The Transformers], Cobra Trooper, Firefly, HISS Tank Driver, HISS Tank [vehicle], Resolute Trooper, Cobra Viper, the Baroness, Cobra Officer
Notes: Title of file is a reference to the phrase Klaatu Barada Nikto. First appearances of Ultra Magnus and the HISS Tank Driver. Panels 9-10: In 1986's The Transformers: The Movie, Ultra Magnus curses as he tries to open the Autobot Matrix of Leadership. Special Thanks to Vash, Sam Raimi, Robert Tapert, and Bruce Campbell.

ARMY OF PLASTIC, CHAPTER FIVE: "HAIL TO THE KING"
[posted July 17, 2009]
STORY ARC 6: "ARMY OF PLASTIC" ends
Who can turn the tide?
STARRING: GAMPs, Resolute Trooper, Cobra Trooper, the Baroness, Cobra Viper, Cobra Officer, Flint, Lady Jaye, Stikfas, HISS Tank Driver, HISS Tank [vehicle], Ultra Magnus [from The Transformers], VAMP [vehicle], Doc
Notes: Title of File is one of Ash's catchphrases from Army of Darkness. Panel 4: Flint's line, "Hey She-Bitch, let's go" is lifted from Army of Darkness. Panel 9: The 9 characters, their poses, and their speech are lifted from Team Fortress 2. From left to right, Pyro, Engineer, Spy, Heavy Weapons Guy, Sniper, Scout, Soldier, Demoman, Medic. Panel 10: The line "Spy sappin' mah HISS Tank!" is a play on "Spy sappin' my Sentry!", a line from Team Fortress 2. Panel 13: Firefly and the Resolute Trooper are alive. Henry the Red merely injured them between Panels 6 and 7. "Groovy" is one of Ash's catchphrases from the Evil Dead films. Panel 17: "Til all are One" is a line from 1986's The Transformers: The Movie. Panel 18: Flint's line is taken from his 5-Pack Filecard. Panel 20: "Our man Flint" is a reference to Our Man Flint. ARAH Doc officially replaced by 25th Anniversary Doc. Special Thanks to Vash, Sam Raimi, Robert Tapert, and Bruce Campbell.

FILE #49 - "UP REAL F#$%ING LATE WITH FRED XLII"
[posted July 24, 2009]
STORY ARC : NONE.
It's the late-night talk show that has the whole barracks talking!
STARRING: Major Bludd, Fred XLII, Duke Nukem, Hawk
Notes: First appearance of Fred XLII. Single-Carded Major Bludd officially replaced by DVD Pack Major Bludd. On Fred XLII's desk is his Crimson Guard helmet, Captain Picard's mug and Ressikan flute, and an Anubis statue from the Indiana Jones line. The studio's rear window overlooks Montreal's Old Port. Panel 3: Major Bludd is upset because of his character's depiction in G.I. Joe: Resolute. Panel 7: In Roman numerals, "XLII" means "42," a reference to The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. "LXIX" means "69." Panel 8: Duke refers to Duke Nukem Forever's cancellation after being in development for over a decade. Panel 9: Hawk appears in his "General" costume rather than his "Original 13" fatigues. Panel 12: Hawk was written out of Resolute and Scarlett's character was handled very poorly. Panel 14: Marvel released 4 G.I. Joe Yearbooks, special issues which recapped the all of the stories of the past year and had other content such as cover galleries, new stories, articles on the animated cartoon show, new artwork, and a letter from Hawk. Panel 15: Many 25th Anniversary figures were plagued by problems such as the inability to sit and arms that couldn't bend 90 degrees.

List of chars and their filenames for Helix failbook posts in Q&A:
http://ages25andup.blogspot.com/2010/03/q-ages-25-up-15-march-2010.html

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